Luna & Cara: A Very Good Store

About 3 weeks ago Luna came over to ask if I wanted to go with them to an herbal store we had heard about in a town about an hour away.  It went really good and I plan on going back soon.  I don't know what to really say about it, I intend to go back as soon as I get a chance, and while I am there I will need to ask if the owner minds me mentioning it in detail on my blog.  The owner is openly practicing, but still I would like to have their permission first. 

I will say that the experience of finding one good resource in your area is a real boost.  It was just a very good experience and I am so glad that I have a place to go (and it helps that it is out of town) to find things I need, and be in the company of someone who has practiced much more than I have. 

Nina Part 4: A Midnight Walk

Nina and I had a good talk last night.  I got to talk about my worries about what she thinks about me, and she got to ask me more questions.  I think we have a much better understanding on this now.  Mostly she was confused about magik, and what I could or had to do; which gave me a chance to explain a few things to her,  I am not currently practicing magik yet, but even if I was I know she doesn't want it and I would never do anything involving her.  So she knows I have that respect for her.

How to handle this has been a big question for me, normally for a question like this I would do some tarot spreads to get some insight on it.  I didn't feel right doing a tarot reading on this particular situation because I knew she didn't like tarot.  So even though it left me feeling in the dark, I felt I needed to respect that as a boundary.

Simply put, I feel much better about her opinion of me, and she now knows that she can ask me anything she wants to ask me, and that I am not going to be doing anything involving her in my practice.    

Nina Part 3: Conversations That Haven't Been

While partying 2 weeks back, I had a bit more to drink than normal for me as a result, I began trying to explain to Nina that she doesn't need to be afraid of me.  I started saying things like, "You know that even if we don't believe the same thing, you know I would never bring anything into your house you don't want. I'm just so worried that you are afraid of me."

Nina laughed, and her answer was, "I'm not afraid of you, I love you, I really want to talk to you about this... but can we talk when we are sober?"

The past few weeks have been busy, I am still looking forward to this conversation.  She keeps reminding me about it as well.  I am nervous about it but excited at the same time.  The way I see it, the conversation will go one of a few ways; I will find out that I have been worried over nothing, that I have been oversensitive about her reaction, or a chance to make more sense of it.  All in all I see this as a positive opportunity. 

It really means a lot to me that she wants to talk more about it; I don't need her to agree with me, I just need to know we have asked all the questions we needed to ask.  Growing up, there wasn't much opportunity for things like, I lived in a type of silence.  If it was something the other person wouldn't understand that was it, there was no negotiation, it was not talked about again.  There was no room for questions where I was raised, questions meant doubt, doubt was a lack of faith, lack of faith was unacceptable and a slap in the face of god.  So I am just glad that I get a chance to talk with Nina soon, even if it means we argue a little, because it shows that we care enough about each other to try to see it their way.